Near to you

He and I had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional, it couldn’t last
I loved him so but I let him go
‘Cause I knew he’d never love me back

Such pain as this
Shouldn’t have to be experienced
I’m still reeling from the loss,
Still a little bit delirious

Near to you, I am healing
But it’s taking so long
‘Cause though he’s gone
And you are wonderful
It’s hard to move on
Yet, I’m better near to you.

You and I have something different
And I’m enjoying it cautiously
I’m battle scarred, I am working oh so hard
To get back to who I used to be

He’s disappearing
Fading subtly
I’m so close to being yours
Won’t you stay with me
Please

Near to you, I am healing
But it’s taking so long
‘Cause though he’s gone
And you are wonderful
It’s hard to move on
Yet, I’m better near to you.

I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I belong
Where you are

Near to you, I am healing
But it’s taking so long
Though he’s gone
And you are wonderful
It’s hard to move on

Near to you, I am healing
But it’s taking so long
‘Cause though he’s gone
And you are wonderful
It’s hard to move on
Yet, I’m better near to you.

Yet, I’m better near to you.

August

I can’t believe it’s already August. Time is passing by way too fast for me. I feel like I haven’t accomplish much this year as in personal improvements but I guess for everything else, I’ve made some progress.  My parents are closing on a house this Thursday.  I’m pretty excited because our family finally has a home that I think is a big transition from our current place in term of space. Soon I will be living in my parents’ basement (for the rest of my life if they allow me to ). The bf is moving in as well, oh and yeah we’re engaged but I still can’t call him my fiancee. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to the term, it jus sounds so strange to me. Anywho, I’m very excited to move on to another chapter of my life that involves another human being and I can’t wait to start building our lives together.  He has been practically at my house every day since we started dating, so I thought it would save him some money and time coming over to my house, instead he can just come home to me (aww isn’t that sweet lol ). We’re not planning on a wedding soon though, I want to wait until 2011 instead but it’s never too early for me to start planning my wedding in my head now (what a freak I know).  Yesterday was also my first time buying big ticket items. I went furniture shopping with my mom hoping to get a good deal on a dining set. Three sale transactions and a couple of hours later, I ended up with 2 sofa sets, 1 dining set, 1 bed, and 1 mattress. At the end of the day, I couldn’t figure out if it’s because I had a great deal on those items or if I got hypnotized the minute I entered the store. Now I can’t wait for the furniture to be delivered in two weeks. It’s the first time in my life that I bought something big with my own hard earned money. I can’t wait to sleep in my queen-sized bed. Is this a sign of growing up if I get excited about furniture?